It's time for an alternative!
Instead of all this sexist claptrap, Sandi Toksvig recommends an alternative - equality! Join our party for 2016. With our very best wishes for a happy holidays from the Women's Equality Party.
Hey there sharp shooter!
Does your little lady like to play rough and tumble? Encourage her inner Katniss with this fun weapon that's not too unfeminine. Comes with pink-tipped bullets that soften the blow of being shot by a girl.
Gather round the games console, little children.
Inject some excitement - and lots of almost-naked women! - into your Christmas with some classic computer gaming. Just make sure you turn the sound down if grandma's in the room. Fun for all the family.
Do you need something manly to put your skinny chai latté in?
Make sure you max out your masculinity during tea breaks. This solid drinks holder comes in rugged white and features a side measuring system and communication tool in the handle. Just don't call it a cup.
Sugar and spice and all things nice.
That's what little girls are made of. Encourage them to stay that way by buying them a tiny oven, ideal for baking their future husband's dinner in. Practice makes perfect!
Show you care with this useful warning sign.
In handy vivid yellow to alert sensible road users, it should help keep your wife/partner/daughter/sister out of mischief while she's behind the wheel. Don't let your woman lose on the road without one!
Don't look a ninny in your pinny!
Cook like a man with this illustrated guide to butch baking, boiling and braising. It's cleverly disguised as a DIY book so no one will think you're a woman or anything. A woman, in the kitchen - imagine!
Desperate to make a big impression on your boss in 2016?
Wow her with your wit and taste by bringing this beautifully crafted pencil sharpener into the office. Sexualising stationery has never been more fun(ny)!
Remember when Lego's little bricks were primary colours?
Not any more! Your bricks are pink, and you can build a shopping mall, because you're a girl. Let the boys get on with building all those boring rockets and pirate ships and superheroes. Constructing for consumption is where it's at.
Men are from Mars, women are from Venus.
Martians are strong and capable. Venetians are a bit needy and weak. And they travel by gondola, singing about Cornettos. Discover these and other truths about gender by spending Christmas with your nose in a good book.